Comments for Working with ACT

Comment on Finding True North: How to Clarify Values (part 1) by Ecash Opinions Legit

Ecash Opinions Legit — Fri, 17 May 2013 06:24:47 +0000

Gday! This is the second time visiting now
and I personally just wanted to say I truley relish looking
through your weblog. I’ve decided to bookmark it at stumbleupon.com with your title: Finding True North: How to Clarify Values (part 1) | Working with ACT and your URL: http://workingwithact.com/2011/10/27/finding-true-north-how-to-clarify-values-part-1/. I hope this is all right with you, I’m trying to give your fantastic blog a bit more coverage.
Be back soon.

Comment on The Science of Gratitude (or What your Mother didn’t teach you about how to say ‘Thank You’) by Rachel Collis

Rachel Collis — Sun, 12 May 2013 18:56:54 +0000

Thanks Maarten, That is a great point. You have made me realise that I think there is a lovely virtuous cycle where mindfulness and perspective taking tend to make us more grateful and being grateful makes us more mindful and all of that links to values. Cool.

Comment on The Science of Gratitude (or What your Mother didn’t teach you about how to say ‘Thank You’) by maartenaalberse

maartenaalberse — Sun, 12 May 2013 17:53:10 +0000

Thank YOu for writing such accessible and meaningful posts, Rachel…

Just want to highlight another part: exploring what we are grateful for is also a wonderful way of discovering what we value. The neat part is that here values are related to positive experience, facilitating a process that I like to call “attracted to valued”. For me this is important because at times the relationship between values and pain is so much on the foreground…

So relating both pain and gratefulness (and the joy that goes with this) to values might help a more complex and flexible “felt relation” to valueing…
Or so I hope.

Comment on Book Reviews by The Science of Gratitude (or What your Mother didn’t teach you about how to say ‘Thank You’) | Working with ACT

Sun, 12 May 2013 15:50:16 +0000

[…] Book Reviews […]

Comment on Closing the intention-behaviour gap by ACT and Conscious Evolution Part B: How ACT can help us respond to global change | Working with ACT

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 06:04:12 +0000

[...] We usually think of ACT as being about individual change. And change at that level is important. ACT helps people better manage their emotions so they might reach out to a friend instead of, for example, buying another pair of shoes to feel better in the short-term. Furthermore, mindfulness training might help people act on their pro-environmental intentions. [...]

Comment on Building Psychological Flexibility by Turning Rules into Ribbons by Flexibility by Turning Rules into Ribbons - Infinite Well Transformation Management and Consulting

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 08:35:11 +0000

[...] Published before by Rachel Collis [...]

Comment on Building Psychological Flexibility by Turning Rules into Ribbons by Rachel Collis

Rachel Collis — Thu, 18 Apr 2013 04:27:30 +0000

Absolutely! I think that is exactly what our minds do – we develop a rule at some point (and it is often a rule that works for us at that time) then it becomes a habit to follow the rule and we beat ourselves up for this.
I think we can even find ourselves making a rule that ‘rules are bad’ and then beat ourselves up when we don’t follow that rule!
Self compassion seems to be the way to go.

Comment on Building Psychological Flexibility by Turning Rules into Ribbons by metonymy4u

metonymy4u — Mon, 15 Apr 2013 21:09:32 +0000

I also think it’s important to remember that many behaviors are not rule controlled once they become habitual. For example, experienced drivers do things automatically like slowing down in the rain, without explicitly thinking to themselves “there is a rule that says it is wise to slow down in the rain.” So I think it’s also important not to beat ourselves up for doing things that have become a matter of habit, especially if there was an undesireable outcome. Not that we shouldn’t try to change those habits, just that it doesn’t help to berate ourselves with “I should have known better” or “I should have followed the rules better” statements.

Comment on Building Psychological Flexibility by Turning Rules into Ribbons by Kim

Kim — Mon, 15 Apr 2013 00:58:12 +0000

Hi Rachel,
Unfortunately, there are those who have and do internalize the adverse effects of a harsh “learning”, of having to edure “the rules”. I was lucky, in spite of everything, I survived and made it to where I am now.
Isn’t it funny. My brother went through much more than I did and was dyslexic, and left handed on top of it all. The abuse he went through (not sexual) during that time, in that school, led him to leave the catholic church to become born again and has been a Baptist Minister for the past 40 years.
Some choose one rule for another.
Everyone has a different deffinition of “horrible”. Everything that has happened in my life, I don’t consider horrible. I consider it an event in my life I have managed to get through and was made better by it.
Some dive into another set of rules.
I just like to move on to the next adventure. Whether good or bad. An adventure, never the less.
I still like to think that, “that which doesn’t kill us, will make us stronger”. Simple as it sounds, but it works for me.
Kim

Comment on Building Psychological Flexibility by Turning Rules into Ribbons by Rachel Collis

Rachel Collis — Sun, 14 Apr 2013 23:33:04 +0000

Hi Kim Your experience with the nuns sounds horrible. Sadly, it was a common way to ‘teach’ children wasn’t it? You are absolutely right – as children we quickly learn to internalise that we must follow rules and then we learn to punish ourselves for not following them. I agree, I think maturity is about making the smart choice – the one that aligns with our values and our long term goals. Rachel